in blue
So this is me in my new room in my flat. As expected it sort of 'just fell into place' for me as usual with the move to Edinburgh. As I mentioned in my earlier posts, I've met lots of people, got a reasonable job and beautiful city to wander and photograph. It sounds silly but things have been so sickeningly happy for me that I am almost bored with it... Don't get me wrong, I completely appreciate how lucky I have it. A week or so ago I woke up on a Sunday to find huge snowflakes floating around outside my window...when strolling through the park to go to my local cinema's Sunday double-bill I was surprised to find a gorgeous winter wonderland in the middle of the city. The mini golf course in the meadows had kids sledging down the slopes, families were making families of snowman and a couple was throwing snowballs and laughing uncontrolably as they chased each other through the elms. It was another one of those moments that I'm sure all travellers know well - the 'Wow.......this is why I'm here' moment.
Despite all these pleasures, this weekend I am starting to get slightly itchy feet. I don't think that it's a problem with Edinburgh at all...more that I'm not sure what I'm doing with myself right now. Working a 9-to-5 job takes a lot out of you and stops you doing things, but I don't think that's the problem. I am starting to think more about the future because I have to...my flight back to Aus in September is going to come up very quick and I'm very aware of that. The trouble is that I know I'm not ready to settle back into life in Australia, but I'm also not sure what I want out of life elsewhere. Now that I have found an excellent city to live in and I don't have any travel coming up immediately I am able to sit and think more about what I really want. I know I want to be more actively creative but I just don't know how. Being around very creative people increases my desire to do something but at the same time stiffles me... is my need to please other people still there stopping me? I don't think so...I think it's a serious lack of direction that's stopping me. So my task in the next few months is to be active in searching out what I want to do with myself...but where to start? I'm going to start by using the darkroom at the local community arts/cafe/studio that my housemates are involved in. Wish me luck...
Outside of my very personal and self-involved dribble I have other news...Adam, Claire and I are flying my Mum over to the UK in July! Since she is the best mother you could possibly wish for Adam thought she deserved to make a trip over and we decided to make it before I go home to Aus. Mum and Nigel will be staying with Adam & Claire in London and then in Edinburgh with me...we'll see if we can fit a weekend trip to Paris and a driving holiday of Scotland into their experience as well. It's safe to say Mum is a very happy lady!
That's it from me for now...
5 Comments:
hi Bec I think you look very professional in your photo with your glasses on and your mum is so excited about the trip. When I saw her on the Friday after her birthday she still couldn't quite believe it.I know what you are saying sometimes when things are all falling into place you wait for something to go wrong but I know you will be fine. lots of love
aunty vic & kuyanxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Yes, I am one very happy lady indeed, we are so looking forward to coming over.
And you and Adam are the best son and daughter anyone could have (how sucky!! but it's true).
Becky you seem happiest to me when you are being creative, and the thing that you seem to love to do, and appear good at to me anyway, is photography. I think you should pursue that - I love the photos that you post. And photography is something you can do anywhere, a good excuse to travel, you just have to find a way to get paid for it!
lots of love from Mum
well it seems other people have made rather profound comments. so i'll stick with the very sexy with the glasses call. :)
hi becky! what have you been up to sweets? im just schooling and you know.. making stuff... having fun! apart from that, and moving into a house in norwood with jaan, not much has been happening... like, for example, tonight is a saturday, and im spending it with a 6 yr old and a 2 yr old... woot! they're pretty funny kids, so i dont REALLy mind, but yeah. im boring laely!
but i totally think you should do something creative! (says mrs "everything is art"... seriuosly, if i have a child, it would still be an art piece... "my ultimate creation... mwahahahaha!!..." maybe not...) but dont let other creative people stifle you... use them as inspiration. make your own zine with some friends, or create a huge art piece as a collaboration with others. take photos of EVERYTHING! go artist run initiatives! woot!
ok. thats my schpeil on the whole thing. take acre sweets.
alley xxx
hey Becky!
wow, you write so well and describtive, I could actually picture the wintery scene...and I definitely know what that "this is why I'm here" moments feels like...have been having quite a few of them out here lately.
I also have these times where I wonder what to do, where to go and all but I have decided not to stress it too much. If you love that spot, why don't you just stay longer? That also gives you time to sort out your creative side.
But yeah, it's easy for me to advise you to chill, I'm in a very laid-back country where the whole attitude is kinda like that when I know that in Europe things are very different.
Anyways, I think it's great that your mum's coming over, I hope she enjoys it, especially in July when the weather is nice!
all the best to you Becky and good luck with the task!
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